I know you see me coming out of the corner of your eye, or your head might even be tilted in my direction as I approach, but followers, why do you snap your heads in the opposite direction when you know I'm coming to ask for a dance but then act all surprised when I tap you on the arm and then gladly accept my invitation?
you see me coming
- Thread starter acpjr
- Start date
redsalsero
Changui
ahaha yeah i have noticed that too great topic starter for tonights dancing 
btw it happens also when the girl is on her own.
its not very atractive to me. its like the lady dont want to be asked.
and if they are two ladies togheter and you turn away i take that as a signal not to be asked. and ofcourse ask the lady next to you.
btw it happens also when the girl is on her own.
its not very atractive to me. its like the lady dont want to be asked.
and if they are two ladies togheter and you turn away i take that as a signal not to be asked. and ofcourse ask the lady next to you.
Bingo.
Also because I want to avoid putting any 'pressure to ask' on the guy. I feel like a direct look is (or can be taken as) a sort of request to be asked.
This is also why I tend to greet salsa people by sort of breezing by them. If they want me they've got time to grab me; if they have their eye on that hot dancer by the door, I won't be standing in their way.
Ditto to all that.
When I'm actually avoiding someone, I walk away rather than just look away.
azzey
Son Montuno
That's funny... I run! :lol:
Yep, I ended up doing that a couple of times at Salsafix at Horwich on Friday. I'm going to ask someone, she looks away, someone sat nearby looks directly at me - the latter gets asked!
Based on extensive experience, I try to keep eye contact to a minimum. As other threads have discussed at length, men generally do not have a sense for subtle signals, so it's better to err on the side of antisocial 
And again, try to put your social expectations and insecurities aside, and just dance - that makes it much simpler and more enjoyable for everyone.
And again, try to put your social expectations and insecurities aside, and just dance - that makes it much simpler and more enjoyable for everyone.redsalsero
Changui
ok i changed my mind cos this is what happened to me yesterday.
so i guess its true.
the whole story
i ask a beautiful lady sitting alone there. but she says no i take a break for 1 song. im like ok but i keep a close eye on her so i will dance the next song with her.
unaware of any other ladys than just the one i want to dance with so i stretched my arm to her and someone just in front of me grabbed my arm. so i said oh no no i wanted to dance with the lady behind you.
i think that was pretty embarrising for her.
not my intention!! worst part i never got a chance to ask her that evening so i have to make it up next time.wat KP-salsa said is true... I generally dun keep tat eye contact for too long in case he didn't ask me for a dance... tat is kind of embarrassing. But I will not act surprised when someone asks me for dance...
In fact... not only ladies... some guys look away too after a while. Either they are not interested or they thought the lady is not interested or fear being rejected for the dance.
In fact... not only ladies... some guys look away too after a while. Either they are not interested or they thought the lady is not interested or fear being rejected for the dance.
Many places that I go to- the standing/"I want to dance" area is on the way to the bathroom. It seems awful to give the guys that 'dance with me' look when they just have to pee! When they approach, I tend to give them the 'look - look away - look again' combination if I want to dance. Sometimes I guess I won't add the last look. If it's a guy that's not as secure or one that I don't know, I look again. When I've made the mistake of not doing that with a new/less secure guy, they tend to go away!!
As antigone says, I also don't make as much eye contact with those who I think might misinterpret it.
As antigone says, I also don't make as much eye contact with those who I think might misinterpret it.
redsalsero
Changui
yeah brings up another question why stand near the bathroom. ive noticed it too at my local club. i have my ideas but i dont think thats were the "i want to dance area"supposed to be. mayby in another thread i can read?