Would you Marry or Date someone who is not a Salsa dancer?

Can't say I have ever had the desire to marry or be in a committed relationship with anyone, salsa related or not.

I belong to nobody, and as a result I am public property and belong to everybody.
I seek ownership over nobody, and as a result I can love everybody equally without expecting anything in return.

So would I go on a date with a girl that doesn't dance salsa? Of course. Would I go one a date with a girl from my salsa scene? Of course.
 
For me at our scene, its irrelevant. All the women are 20 years younger, with a couple of exceptions, and those exceptions are usually 20 years older. Or married.

I am unsure whether it would be wise to date people from the club/studio. If I dated another diehard/regular (not that there are any my age) and it went poorly, then my "happy place" would be compromised.

But generally, I always plan to be dancing. So I would want to date someone who at least did something dance related with me from time to time, and who wouldn't mind me dancing sometimes when she wasnt around.
 
Slowdance said:
For me at our scene, its irrelevant. All the women are 20 years younger, with a couple of exceptions, and those exceptions are usually 20 years older. Or married.

I am unsure whether it would be wise to date people from the club/studio. If I dated another diehard/regular (not that there are any my age) and it went poorly, then my "happy place" would be compromised.

But generally, I always plan to be dancing. So I would want to date someone who at least did something dance related with me from time to time, and who wouldn't mind me dancing sometimes when she wasnt around.
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I feel the same way, having someone that was at least interested in dance.
A separate venue just for the two of you would be best and still go to your regular weekly one before you met, as it'll make it a easier transition.
Feelings develop on the dance floor, but you know unless you talk with them on subjects not related to dance, and what type of personality they have.
I don't want to be questioned why I am dancing with other women, as to me it's just dancing and stays on the floor.
 
I understand the concern about breaking up, but we're all adults, and we should be able to work things out after break up, so it doesn't start bothering either side. If you can't be in the same room with your ex, you both screwed up.
 
Kromat83 said:
I don't want to be questioned why I am dancing with other women, as to me it's just dancing and stays on the floor.
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Its just dancing until you have an undeniable connection/chemistry with someone.
Believe me when you fall in love it becomes less important to dance with multiple partners if it makes your partner uncomfortable.
 
Now that I've been around a while, I can see both sides of this. Yes, there are guys in the salsa scene who can be characterized as 'players', and they probably wouldn't be good choices for women who want a relationship. And then there are the female equivalents who may hook up with these guys, and know what they're getting. Now, the guys I'm thinking of are constantly hitting on women, and it's probably the main reason they go dancing. And one can see women, too, who go to salsa clubs mainly to meet guys.

But there are plenty of 'serious' dancers who are there because they love the dance (and hopefully the music). And they sometimes do form couples for longer periods of time, and even marry. These types often know each other for quite a while, maybe even years, before they start dating.
 
It's hard to see each other for years and not want to date, unless that perks I is really out of your age range, and just enjoy the dance for that one song or others, if you want it to continue.
I can practice on the side with her as much as i can, why should restrict who I dance with ? I am there to improve and have fun, we would be able to share enough dances throughout the night, so there needs to be an understanding for it to work.
 
SnowDancer said:
But there are plenty of 'serious' dancers who are there because they love the dance (and hopefully the music).
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I know plenty of serious dancers that are there to dance be if the opportunity comes along they jump at it. I know a pro dancer who tried to get me to "go out" with him even though he had a girlfriend, who was also a dancer. So the idea that serious dancers dont "hook up" is not always true. It may seem that way from a far but under the surface is another story.
 
calichris10 said:
I know plenty of serious dancers that are there to dance be if the opportunity comes along they jump at it. I know a pro dancer who tried to get me to "go out" with him even though he had a girlfriend, who was also a dancer. So the idea that serious dancers dont "hook up" is not always true. It may seem that way from a far but under the surface is another story.
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Yes, I didn't mean to imply that all serious dancers were good relationship material, or that non-serious dancers were not (though it came out sounding like that).
 
SnowDancer said:
Yes, I didn't mean to imply that all serious dancers were good relationship material, or that non-serious dancers were not (though it came out sounding like that).
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No, I knew what you meant..I just think some people don't realize what goes on:p Some would be surprised. But it really isn't unlike any other group of people who are together a lot, see each other night after night...
 
I am not saying that everyone will attract you, but the majority of women that go out stay in pretty good shape and first it will be here exterior and the chemistry you both have on the dance floor, but it'll make a difference after you talk to them, but personality doesn't always play a factor, as intentions are different by some as mentioned earlier, caution should be had wherever you go.
Chris, your right about the frequent encounters make you want to get the person more, whatever way you see it.
 
Hi there,
I know it's an old thread but here is my question/situation. I just met a woman who is a beginner (dancing for 2 month). Frankly I feel like because of Salsa dancing it won't work out for me because I don't like to date a beginner dancer in the salsa scene. I know this sounds selfish but when I go out dancing I love to dance my butt of. With a beginner I can't do that. There are simply to many restrictions. I really don't mind dancing with a beginner at a salsa party. But dancing 85% of the dances with a beginner is kinda boring. I even don't get really sweaty which I normally am.

As an advanced dancer how do u feel to date an absolute beginner? Or do u think it's maybe better to date a non-salsa dancer who doesn't want to get into dancing?
 
Is there any phrase in the English language more depressing than 'advanced dancer'? No offence but it has very negative connotations to me. The above post does nothing to challenge that.
 
DJ Yuca I know that my post has a negative connotation and I don't like at all how I feel about that. I just can't change my emotions at this point. I try to make the best out of it. E.g. we were at a party with good followers. Because she's a beginner nobody asks her for a dance. Therefore I feel bad dancing with other woman while she's standing at the side of the dancefloor. Because I feel bad I dance almost the complete night only with her and after a while I get bored. I don't know how to turn off this feeling.
 
salsamaniac4ever said:
Hi there,
I know it's an old thread but here is my question/situation. I just met a woman who is a beginner (dancing for 2 month). Frankly I feel like because of Salsa dancing it won't work out for me because I don't like to date a beginner dancer in the salsa scene. I know this sounds selfish but when I go out dancing I love to dance my butt of. With a beginner I can't do that. There are simply to many restrictions. I really don't mind dancing with a beginner at a salsa party. But dancing 85% of the dances with a beginner is kinda boring. I even don't get really sweaty which I normally am.

As an advanced dancer how do u feel to date an absolute beginner? Or do u think it's maybe better to date a non-salsa dancer who doesn't want to get into dancing?
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Before I give you my view, I'm curious: how long have you been dancing?
 
salsamaniac4ever said:
DJ Yuca I know that my post has a negative connotation and I don't like at all how I feel about that. I just can't change my emotions at this point. I try to make the best out of it. E.g. we were at a party with good followers. Because she's a beginner nobody asks her for a dance. Therefore I feel bad dancing with other woman while she's standing at the side of the dancefloor. Because I feel bad I dance almost the complete night only with her and after a while I get bored. I don't know how to turn off this feeling.
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My comment goes way beyond your present dilemma, and is mostly about my previous encounters with the wonderful phrase 'advanced dancer'.

Re. your dilemma - I'm no expert in these things (to say the least) but the lady in question might not actually mind if you dance with other ladies, within reason i.e. not for the vast majority of the night. You could also ask your male friends (if you have any) to dance with her.

Good luck whatever you decide.
 
salsamaniac4ever said:
i there,
I know it's an old thread but here is my question/situation. I just met a woman who is a beginner (dancing for 2 month). Frankly I feel like because of Salsa dancing it won't work out for me because I don't like to date a beginner dancer in the salsa scene. I know this sounds selfish but when I go out dancing I love to dance my butt of. With a beginner I can't do that. There are simply to many restrictions. I really don't mind dancing with a beginner at a salsa party. But dancing 85% of the dances with a beginner is kinda boring. I even don't get really sweaty which I normally am.

As an advanced dancer how do u feel to date an absolute beginner? Or do u think it's maybe better to date a non-salsa dancer who doesn't want to get into dancing?
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You're not obligated to dance with her all night (although I also think it's common courtesy to dance with the person you are dating). If I like someone, then the dance carries a special connection that goes beyond dance ability. There is REAL chemistry. I could slow dance with her and I would be fine with it.

Pretty much all of the dancers i've dated were not compatible with me dance-wise, but our dances were always special because we genuinely liked each other.

If I was dating someone who thought I was too below her level of dance and disliked dancing with me for this reason, i'd feel beyond crappy.
 
salsamaniac4ever said:
Hi there,
I know it's an old thread but here is my question/situation. I just met a woman who is a beginner (dancing for 2 month). Frankly I feel like because of Salsa dancing it won't work out for me because I don't like to date a beginner dancer in the salsa scene. I know this sounds selfish but when I go out dancing I love to dance my butt of. With a beginner I can't do that. There are simply to many restrictions. I really don't mind dancing with a beginner at a salsa party. But dancing 85% of the dances with a beginner is kinda boring. I even don't get really sweaty which I normally am.

As an advanced dancer how do u feel to date an absolute beginner? Or do u think it's maybe better to date a non-salsa dancer who doesn't want to get into dancing?
Click to expand...
She might also prefer dancing with a wider variety of leads. I know liked to dance with many different leads when I was a beginner. And the beginner stage doesn't last forever. She will get better. But I would *still* want to dance with many leads per night.

What would I expect from a BF/husband. Maybe the first dance of the evening when we get to the club to warm up. then dance with other partners. When we both are without partners hook up for another dance or if they play one of our favorite songs.

What I *really* wouldn't like would be a BF who said "I don't really feel like dancing right now" to me but always said yes to other women. I had a BF like that. He said "I feel comfortable with you so I can say no, but I feel guilty saying no to other women" I did not like his logic.
 
salsamaniac4ever said:
For 20 years. The first 10 years more Cuban and since beginning of 2005 NY-Style but with a break of almost 4 years.
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If it bothers you, take her to less advanced scenes and teach her on the side, she'll appreciate it.
I think your ego is getting in the way of just enjoying her company.
There are other activities besides dancing, you can eliminate one day for just the 2 of you, and use one or two for yourself.
How long have you known this person ? It seems pretty selfish, if there's attraction between the two of you.
 
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