How long before you started dancing at the clubs?

Morningstar said:
Hi, I am just beginning Salsa, I am still very awkward to say at least, and I was wondering how long it took you to feel comfortable going dancing at a club?

Also I am taking classes 2 times a week (1hr), I am a male and I have no previous experience dancing ANYTHING! Any guesses how long it might take me not to completely embarrass myself at a club/get comfortable?
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I didn't dance at all before salsa (except nightclubs). I didn't even realise there were salsa clubs or big social dancing events until several months of my salsa life had gone by and I'd moved cities and so came to realise what salsa actually was. (Though I did dancing after class once a week right from about week 3; I don't remember feeling awkward there, but the number of people who stayed to dance was tiny and everyone was super friendly).

Once I left that initial teacher/class I basically started dancing at bigger nights straight away; I was so awful, but I though I was hot stuff - lol. Ignorance is bliss in terms of confidence to just get out there and dance. I did learn pretty quick that I wasn't good at all though, and I also got better really fast largely by social dancing a lot (plus some better lessons). Nothing beats dancing to make you better at dancing.

The more I danced the less and less I cared about what others thought of me. Now I don't care at all, and that gives me the freedom to experiment on the dance-floor without worrying. I wish I had stopped caring a lot earlier because the reality is almost no-one is going to be watching you until you are very good (and even then there's almost certainly going to be better people on the floor that others will notice more)...

...I have only ever really watched/noticed dancers I think are better than me, and I think that goes for most people. I think there is a lot of truth that beginners are kind of invisible. I sometimes notice beginners who look like they are having loads of fun, but I never notice how good or bad they are, I just get a happy warm-feeling as they are getting into salsa :)

Ok, there is just one beginner leader I do notice - he is a very manly straight man, but takes no real lessons and just seems to learn by copying - one unfortunate side-effect is he does loads of very over the top and feminine lady's styling (how he hasn't noticed men don't do this I do not know!) - anyway it looks hysterical, and it's kinda hard not to laugh when dancing with him. That said, the reason I don't like dancing with him is not the styling, but because he has terrible, terrible timing and tries to do lots of really complex moves that he can't do at all - that is the worst kind of dance for a follower. I will honestly more than happily dance with a smiley beginner who does nothing more than the basic step in time with the occasional right turn.

Relax, smile, keep it simple - go dance :)
 
londongirl said:
no-one is going to be watching you until you are very good (and even then there's almost certainly going to be better people on the floor that others will notice more)...

...I have only ever really watched/noticed dancers I think are better than me, and I think that goes for most people. I think there is a lot of truth that beginners are kind of invisible. I sometimes notice beginners who look like they are having loads of fun, but I never notice how good or bad they are, I just get a happy warm-feeling as they are getting into salsa :)
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Agree - and if you are worried about being noticed - then go dance in the middle of the dancefloor - it is only the people on the outside edges that get seen :)
 
olamalam said:
I remember, when I was beginner (I guess 2-3 months old) once I've been to a party in istanbul, everybody was sitting around, nobody was dancing at all. (Later on I realized that people don't start dancing until floor gets crowded.) I asked a girl, she said yes (I guessed she thought I must be really good since I asked her while noone was dancing on the dance floor). Then she said surprisingly "ohh you are a beginner!"
Me: Yesss :)
She: Ohh everbody is watching us now.
Me: So what?
She: They will make fun of me
Me: :?

Anyway, we finished the dance in spite of her bored face :)
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You are a talent practically since birth, eh? ;)
 
I only started social dancing after about 4-5 months, I wish I'd have had to confidence to have started sooner, but I have swiftly made up for my earlier tardiness :)
 
5 months ago when i first started a friend of mine dragged me along to the tryout week of the salsa danceschool where i take my lessons now.
On my third day of dancing salsa i already went to a social and just started doing basics and simpel cross body leads and single right turns.

Thats basically all i did for the whole evening and i had so much fun doing it. :)
From that day on i kept going to socials.
 
salsology said:
Agree - and if you are worried about being noticed - then go dance in the middle of the dancefloor - it is only the people on the outside edges that get seen :)
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That is true but it is also much harder to dance in the middle of a crowded dance floor. More people to step on or bump into or vice versa. If you are a beginner leader and lead your follower into harm's way: they remember that.
 
salsology said:
Agree - and if you are worried about being noticed - then go dance in the middle of the dancefloor - it is only the people on the outside edges that get seen :)
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bailar y tocar said:
That is true but it is also much harder to dance in the middle of a crowded dance floor. More people to step on or bump into or vice versa. If you are a beginner leader and lead your follower into harm's way: they remember that.
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I really don't think it matters where you dance, you can be on the edge of the dance floor and be a beginner and people still won't notice you...so don't be afraid to use the edges of the dance floor.

Besides, nothing is worse than being crowded in on all sides during a dance. I'll often only dance every 3 or 4 songs (or more) when the dance floor is even only a little crowded, instead of dancing every song one after the other. I end up conserving a lot of energy, and I get my best dances in the last hour or two of a night, when the dance floor is less crowded...but not recommended for every scene, just some of the venues around mine ;)
 
Morningstar said:
I know that everybody is individual but I am trying to get a general sense (poll?) how long a majority of people took to be comfortable enough with their Salsa skills? If you could also indicate if you had any previous dance experience (besides Salsa) that would be great!
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I'll answer this question in a couple of different ways, and end with a specific recommendation.

Since I was a very young kid, I always liked music and dancing, but never went social dancing on a consistent basis until college. Even though the music at those college parties was usually pop or hip-hop (i.e., never a closed-embrace partner hold), at least I developed a comfort level of being on a dance floor facing a person of the opposite gender and expressing myself to music. That was an important foundation.

It was years later (when I was an adult and had finished school) that I learned the basics of of Salsa and Merengue from a friend on a very informal level. I went with a few friends to a Latin club after a dinner, and one female Colombian friend literally walked me to the corner of the club and showed me the basic steps -- then she was patient enough to dance a couple of songs with me on the dance floor. :notworthy: I developed a large number of Latino friends, so I later had plenty of opportunities for dancing Salsa on a basic level at clubs, parties, weddings, etc. Because Salsa music and dancing were introduced to me through friends, I was comfortable with the basic steps and the environment from the very beginning, and I was not intimidated by the music.

However, I was realistic in knowing that I couldn't lead more than a basic inside turn or outside turn, or moves that required a crossbody lead. I dabbled with a month of classes on two different occasions, but actually it was a few years before I eventually committed to taking Salsa classes on a continuing basis. A male Cuban friend of mine signed up with me for a group class at the Beginner level, and I quickly made friends with the other men and women in the Salsa class. We all started making plans to meet with each other at the clubs within about a month after getting started, and dancing with each other to practice what we learned in class. Given those circumstances, I was comfortable using what I knew with dancers in a social setting almost right away.

It was probably within 4-5 months of starting those classes (although clearly I had a "head start" on most other Beginners) that I felt very comfortable dancing with any Beginner or Intermediate Salsa dancer. I have a specific recollection (about 4 months into classes) of going to a Salsa club with one Intermediate friend of mine, who recommended that I dance a song with an Advanced friend of hers -- and after the song the Advanced dancer told my friend that I was "good." :) Great boost for my ego! I also joined my instructor's performance team within about 6 months of starting those classes, which also greatly aided my development. I would say that about 10-12 months after I started those classes, I felt like I could dance with any Advanced dancer and keep her entertained for at least one song. I can't guarantee whether I was right or wrong, but at least I believed that way. ;) It was sometime within the following year that I felt like I could provide Advanced women with multiple enjoyable dances during the same night.

My experience with Swing dancing (after I learned Salsa informally and before I committed to Salsa classes on a continuing basis) may be a little closer to the Original Poster's situation. The dance structure of Swing was totally new to me, and lead-follow technique had never been fully explained prior to then. Still, one key component is that I made a few friends within 4-6 weeks after starting Swing classes and then meeting with them at places for dancing Swing socially. I didn't stick with Swing long enough to become higher than Intermediate-level at it, but I did feel comfortable dancing socially with ladies near my level almost right away.

The bottom line is that different people may come into your dance class with widely different degrees of experience in that dance or other dances. One of the most important things you can do -- regardless of your personal skill level -- is to start developing a friend network as soon as possible (even if it's just one or two people at the beginning). It is remarkably beneficial to have the support of another person (or multiple people) when you're going into an unfamiliar environment, especially if they have the same level of interest/commitment to the dance as you do. Even if (and when) you totally screw up a dance, it's nice to walk back to your drink/table and have a supportive face there.

It's easier if you make those types of friends within your class, but it is still possible to make those friends in the social dancing setting itself. In either case, you should be getting yourself into the social dancing setting as soon as you can. Also make other "dance friends" as soon as you can. Good luck with everything! :)
 
Morningstar said:
Hi, I am just beginning Salsa, I am still very awkward to say at least, and I was wondering how long it took you to feel comfortable going dancing at a club?

Also I am taking classes 2 times a week (1hr), I am a male and I have no previous experience dancing ANYTHING! Any guesses how long it might take me not to completely embarrass myself at a club/get comfortable?

I know that everybody is individual but I am trying to get a general sense (poll?) how long a majority of people took to be comfortable enough with their Salsa skills? If you could also indicate if you had any previous dance experience (besides Salsa) that would be great!

Thanks
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Hey Morningstar, welcome to the addictive world of salsa...

It's tough at the start, when you're just learning the basics. I had no dance background other than 'I liked to dance to some kinds of music' - I would always start after my early classes to just watch people dance - but I didn't dance much at all until about 1 month after my first class... and even then it was always with the other beginners in my class.

Someone else asked me this in person the other week, saying that Ï'm going home as soon as class ends... I don't have enough moves yet."

I told them this: "What you see and get taught in a class setting, is like any lesson you would have taken at school... The teacher stands at the front and tells you stuff, gets you to think about what it means and how it fits. But you still need to do the homework."

Getting out into the clubs, dancing socially is your homework. Doesn't matter if you make mistakes. It's how you'll learn. So just dive in there! Go to the clubs as much as you can, even if you don't dance much, just watch and absorb the atmosphere. You can pick up a lot just by observing others.
 
Big thanks to everybody who replied, I really appreciate it :D! The general consensus seem to be that it is better sooner then later, so that is exactly what I am planning to do! I will probably wait a few months (not more then 5 though) to start asking people but I will just go and check out the club atmosphere with my buddies way sooner then that!

I am not really worried about people around me staring because if they have nothing better to do then stare at a newb well that says more about them then about me :P! Besides I will probably be to busy thinking about my steps and the rhythm to even notice them.

What worries me though is my dance partner getting seriously annoyed by me:oops: I guess I am just a little more sensitive to that then most people, but I kind of feel awkward if I sense they can't wait for the song to be over or that they are dancing with me out of pity :)! Worse, the thread "What's the worst thing anyone has said or done to you on the dance floor?" summarizes my misgivings about jumping in right away:oops: I mean me being so bad that my partner leaves in the middle of the dance, I don't think I could live that one down LOL :)

Mean people suck, and I will just do what I always advise people starting in martial arts, or anything else for that matter :D : Leave your Ego at the door!
I will prepare myself that I will suck in the beginning and patiently learn one day at the time until I start rocking it LOL! Once I get really good of course, I will genuinely love to show Newbs a good time, because I believe in paying it forward.\:cool:

Thanks everybody again,

Ps. The thread is by no means closed, anybody who still wishes to chime in is welcome ;)
 
Morningstar said:
I will probably wait a few months (not more then 5 though) to start asking people but I will just go and check out the club atmosphere with my buddies way sooner then that!

Worse, the thread "What's the worst thing anyone has said or done to you on the dance floor?" summarizes my misgivings about jumping in right away:oops: I mean me being so bad that my partner leaves in the middle of the dance, I don't think I could live that one down LOL :)
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Months?!

If you are a beginner in a leader heavy scene you won't get many dances with experienced follows (unless they think you are very cute).

If you are a beginner in a follower heavy scene, they'll put up with you while hoping you'll get better and eventually much better and then remember that they accepted your dance requests back in the day.

If you are in a dance scene where everyone is rude and no one cares about etiquette - travel for salsa. 2 weeks in either NYC, Havana, Cali, LA with lessons and clubbing every day and you'll be as good as anyone when you get back.
 
Morningstar said:
I am in the Boston scene, is it a leader or follower heavy scene :)?
Is it a good scene and is it easy or hard on the beginners?

Thanks
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May I suggest to move your post to the Boston scene? thread, where I'm sure our fellow member ColdSalsero will be able to see and tell you, as he's from Boston as well.
 
Get out there ASAP! No matter how "BRUTAL" a scene may be, there are always several beginners there watching. I'd recommend looking along the "Walls" for those other beginners who are watching "WIDE EYED". Approach with confidence and they may admit to being a beginner, which is what you may want for starters. It will also make for some conversation. Knowing your both on the same level and giving support to each other will help both...no matter how "BRUTAL" a dance scene may seem.
Just watch the dance floor so you don't dance near the brutal "Floor Hogs". They normally are the ones who'll step on you. LOL! Get Out There!!!

Keep Smiling....Keep Dancing....Y Dale Mambo
I am Miguel "El Mambo"
 
Morningstar said:
What worries me though is my dance partner getting seriously annoyed by me:oops: I guess I am just a little more sensitive to that then most people, but I kind of feel awkward if I sense they can't wait for the song to be over or that they are dancing with me out of pity :)! Worse, the thread "What's the worst thing anyone has said or done to you on the dance floor?" summarizes my misgivings about jumping in right away:oops: I mean me being so bad that my partner leaves in the middle of the dance, I don't think I could live that one down LOL :)
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I know what you are saying. I am probably a lot more sensitive about getting unwelcome vibes from followers. I am only mentioning followers because I am a leader and only ask followers for a dance. Among beginners who are reluctant to ask, chalk me up right there. So this is coming from someone who had a great difficulty overcoming internal reluctance to ask girls. I had every conceivable reasons going through my head - I am awkward to dance, she won't like my dancing, she doesn't like me, she is too good, I don't know enough, add everything else. And I am in a leader heavy scene.

However......

I went out social dancing right from my very first week. I went out dancing 2 or 3 or more times a week. I would stand in that corner watching the best dancers strut their stuff. Get intimidated by how good everyone was. Yet I would try to see someone that I think will dance with me and ask them. In my scene women rarely ask leaders unless they know them well. BTW I have never been left standing on the floor, except by one girl at my very first LA congress when I barely knew how to dance. Other times have been for emergency, or mutual because song is too long or we weren't feeling it. Each of it only once.

Long story short..

There are far more nice people out there willing to dance with you. The stories you hear about "worse thing on the dance floor" are exceptions rather than the rule. Have you seen the thread on compliments ? I can tell you from personal experience that for every 1 person that might offend you for whatever reason, there are 9 people who are super nice. If you give up on 9 people who will dance with you for fear of 1 person who might offend you - then you are doing disservice to no one but yourself. You are hampering your own dancing.

This is one place where if you dive at the deep end of the pool, you won't drown.
 
Offbeat said:
I can tell you from personal experience that for every 1 person that might offend you for whatever reason, there are 9 people who are super nice. If you give up on 9 people who will dance with you for fear of 1 person who might offend you - then you are doing disservice to no one but yourself. You are hampering your own dancing.

This is one place where if you dive at the deep end of the pool, you won't drown.
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I estimate the ratio is closer to 1 to 3000. I do remember the <5 people who pissed me off but it pales in comparison to the 14 years x ~40 weeks x ~15 dance partners who made and make it all worthwhile and are very generous in their compliments. The longer one waits the more one misses out. There is just nothing like it.
 
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