Do you do "fancy" invitation/thank you?

D

Dalaran1991

Changui
Ok I might be an old-school guy, but part of the reason I like dancing is bc you can inject some fancy etiquette or "chivalry" that would normally be weird into it.

You know, things like this picture:

lesfashion2L.jpg


http://www.americanantiquarian.org/Exhibitions/Dance/danceimages/lesfashion2L.jpg

I find this incredibly elegant and love doing it. Generally I enjoyed positive reactions so far, giggles and eye batting. Maybe coincidentally, it's all from the "classy" ladies in the scene. Rarely I do have some weird looks, but I don't mind.

Took a lady's hand today and kiss it old-school style as we finish the dance, she seemed to love it :)

I have seen other guys do it very well too. This tall black gentleman in my scene would lower bend his legs and spread his arms wide while looking the lady directly in the eyes. That should be irresistible.

So gentlemen, do you have fancy entry/exit of your own? Stories? And ladies, do you enjoy seeing such gestures? :D
 
Personally, I don't really do "fancy" etiquette, I just politely ask ladies if they would like to dance, and then give a simple thank you at the end and walk off. This is because I am lazy, and because I don't really like to put on a show (other than in my actual dancing :p).

In the Boston community in general, most people just stick to the standard above (ask for a dance and a "Thank you" at the end). Among the regulars, fancy etiquette wouldn't be "weird", but it might get old after a while. Dance conventions and etiquette around here revolve around practicality, for the most part. "Fancy" etiquette is just too much work :p

I've seen a professional Korean salsero start off a dance by kissing a girl's hand. Nothing particularly wrong with that, other than the possible yuck factor because of hygiene (you don't know where that hand has been...).

Occasionally, when I'm escorting a girl to the dance floor, I'll put her arm through my elbow, just so that it doesn't look like I'm dragging her behind me like some barbaric cave man.

But really, do whatever you want. Some people may either think you're a character and find it funny/charming, while others may think you're too old fashioned or trying to get laid. Whatever. Be yourself, and adjust to different people accordingly.
 
No fancy etiquette for me either, eye contact , raised eyebrow,extended hand....for follows I'm familiar with, for follows I don't know a polite "would you like to dance?", I've been told many times I need to work on my dance etiquette,you know escort the follow to the floor,take her hand etc. At the end of the dance, a thank you or a hug to the follow, depending on how good it was for both of us, sometimes a high five if the dance was awesome.
 
Asking someone to dance is sometimes a rushed affair. Once the music starts then there can be a rush to the dance floor. If there is time before the music starts then I might engage in some small talk. At the end of the dance there is always a thank you and sometimes I get a hug. The 19th century is somehow not in vogue around here.
 
Actually the better I know a follower the worse my etiquette gets XD. If I don't know her I will extend my hand, smile, and ask "would you like to dance?". If I know her well I'll just extend my hand and maybe nod toward the dance floor. If it's crowded then when walking to the dance floor I'll sometimes wrap her arms around my waist so that it's easier to weave her through the gaps with me to reach an open space without getting hit. At the end of the dance I hug and say thanks regardless of how well I know them or how well the dance with them went.

I have a friend who when possible will walk the lady arm-in-arm back to where she was standing. In my own experience, after we thank each other the ladies I dance with tend to go so it hasn't been a very practical thing to add to my habits XD
 
Maybe in the olden days, there were plenty of women to dance with. On a lead-heavy night, I'll usually just extend my hand, even to a stranger. And if she makes any motion at all towards me or my hand, I'll grab hers and take her to the floor. Often it's just a fraction of a second before two other guys approach her, so it's a matter of survival.:)
 
SnowDancer said:
Maybe in the olden days, there were plenty of women to dance with. On a lead-heavy night, I'll usually just extend my hand, even to a stranger. And if she makes any motion at all towards me or my hand, I'll grab hers and take her to the floor. Often it's just a fraction of a second before two other guys approach her, so it's a matter of survival.:)
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I thought PDX was follower heavy!!!!
 
GForce85 said:
I have a friend who when possible will walk the lady arm-in-arm back to where she was standing. In my own experience, after we thank each other the ladies I dance with tend to go so it hasn't been a very practical thing to add to my habits XD
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LOLLLLL this repeated barbaric pattern is why here in Paris they call Americans savages :D :D :D :D But ya know, these Europeans still have time to take 3 tea/coffee break a day with 35 hours work week, so :D

But I totally agree with you GForce (the GIF is so funny lol), sometimes the girl would be squeezing my hand and smile and then she would run like her beautiful behind is on fire :D So to protect my dignity I look at her while already turning my body away.

Hmm maybe it's just about my venues, but I think if you have to rush like D-Day to a girl then something it's wrong. For me, the moment the dance was about to end I already know who I'm dancing with next. If I have eye contact then I lock in like a homing missile and she knows it's on, so I have time to stride forward and put on my show. If no eye contact then yeah I rush up but then I put myself in front of her and block other guys' advance, and still put on my show. Guess I'm just lucky.

@ColdSalsero , I totally agree with that attitude. That's what I've been doing anyway, what others think it's not my problem. And here we don't have an obsession with germ so hand kissing is not a rare sight.
 
Dalaran1991 said:
LOLLLLL this repeated barbaric pattern is why here in Paris they call Americans savages :D :D :D :D But ya know, these Europeans still have time to take 3 tea/coffee break a day with 35 hours work week, so :D
...
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The Parisians may think of us as savages, but at least we're not approaching random girls from behind to just start grinding on them without consent :P
 
For me, it depends on the girl. For most of them, it's mostly a look/blink and we are dancing. But some like if you offer her the hand (especially ex b/room girls) and bring her to the floor big style, similar way like we were doing on the competitions, so I do it the way they like (it's just an additional styling at the beginning and end)
 
Dalaran1991 said:
Hmm maybe it's just about my venues, but I think if you have to rush like D-Day to a girl then something it's wrong. For me, the moment the dance was about to end I already know who I'm dancing with next. If I have eye contact then I lock in like a homing missile and she knows it's on, so I have time to stride forward and put on my show. If no eye contact then yeah I rush up but then I put myself in front of her and block other guys' advance, and still put on my show. Guess I'm just lucky.
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At some of the venues here in CHI, its not so much im rushing to get the girl...im rushing to get the girl SO that we can actually have somewhere to dance. Its almost like a 20s rule with me- if its crazy crowded, and i dont have someone on the floor fairly quickly dancing, i will just wait it out and put myself in good position to get on the next song (hoping its not bachata). A major pet peeve of mine is the lead that chooses to pull someone out on a crowded dancefloor midway through a song, and then proceeds to disrupt the equilibrium the dancers had established (if a lead brings someone out halfway through and makes it work, and not at my expense, things are all good)

To the OP: I definitely like the coming up to women and asking them to dance like a gentleman aspect of salsa...as opposed to the sneaking up on them that happens in a lot of hip hop/top 40/dance clubs. but as others have said, the better i know the lady in question, the more likely I am to use shorthand. a tap on the shoulder and extended hand. or if there is some distance between us, eye contact and nod to the dancefloor.
 
I usually just ask "Would you like to dance?".

With some followers I have special sign language that only we can understand! For example with one girl I have: 2 shoulder bumps with the right shoulder = we want to dance. 99 shoulder bumps with right shoulder = we do not want to dance. However if you hit 100 shoulder bumps by accident, you have to buy the other person diner.
I take my salsa serious.
 
Kading said:
I usually just ask "Would you like to dance?".

With some followers I have special sign language that only we can understand! For example with one girl I have: 2 shoulder bumps with the right shoulder = we want to dance. 99 shoulder bumps with right shoulder = we do not want to dance. However if you hit 100 shoulder bumps by accident, you have to buy the other person diner.
I take my salsa serious.
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I thought after 100 shoulder bumps you sign up for rugby/football/judo championship? :D that's seriousness
 
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