Confessions of a Computer Geek..... [Archive]

View Full Version : Confessions of a Computer Geek.....

peachexploration

12-22-2004, 02:10 PM

This is just a place where us "Geeks" vent. :lol:
Today's scenario: I have had two people in my office to hound me for over a year regarding why they don't have a CD burner and how important it is that they have one and what they can do with them to make their work life easier, blah, blah blah... So, we purchase one for them. Then they ask me:
"How does it work?" :shock: :? :shock: :? :lol: 8)

MacMoto

12-23-2004, 02:26 AM

:lol: :lol:

Haz

12-23-2004, 10:30 AM

lol...isn't there a list some place online about crazy tech support questions? best i can remember is "My cup holder won't go in or out of the computer any more. Whats wrong with it? - Ma'am that's your CD player."

peachexploration

12-23-2004, 10:43 AM

Yeah, I used to have a whole bunch of links to computer tech jokes but the ones happening in my office began to be much funnier. :lol: :lol:

Here are some great short ones:
Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one... :roll:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left? :roll:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you. :roll:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. :roll:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work! :?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
A customer couldn't get on the internet.
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars. :lol: :lol: :lol:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a
screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the
mouse, it disappears! :?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around it? :lol: :lol:

David

12-27-2004, 10:10 PM

Those are great, Peach! :lol: :lol: :lol:

squirrel

12-28-2004, 03:03 AM

:) Funny! :lol: :lol: :lol:

peachexploration

01-10-2005, 05:45 PM

Downloads take forever when you're in a hurry. :roll: :?

peachexploration

02-21-2005, 10:12 AM

:!: :!: :!: :evil: :evil:

Good grief! :roll:

SDsalsaguy

02-21-2005, 12:49 PM

:!: :!: :!: :evil: :evil:

Good grief! :roll:
Huh :?: :? :?:

peachexploration

02-21-2005, 03:33 PM

Just typical computer user "It's Monday, I can't remember anything from last week" type behavior at work today. :? Some people should not be allowed to have weekends. :roll:

SDsalsaguy

02-21-2005, 04:35 PM

:lol: ....gotcha' ;)

peachexploration

03-02-2005, 02:19 PM

:nope: :nope: How is possible that a computer user would have at least ten years experience in opening, creating, saving and editing documents and not have a clue as to where the documents are stored. Then have the audacity to ask me where they are? :? :nope: :nope: Just cracks me up. :lol: :lol:

SDsalsaguy

03-02-2005, 05:29 PM

You mean they're *not* stored on paper inside the printer until you request that the printer provide you with that printed copy??? :shock: :shock: :shock: :oops: :oops: :oops: :shock: :shock: :shock:

peachexploration

03-02-2005, 09:26 PM

ROTFL :lol: :lol: :lol: Too Funny, SD!

PS. This is post #2000!! Yippppeeee!!!!! :bouncy: :rocker: :banana:

peachexploration

03-07-2005, 09:36 AM

Well, it's Monday and of course a whole department cannot remember how to burn a CD. :? :roll: :buttkick:

SDsalsaguy

03-07-2005, 10:35 AM

peachexploration

03-07-2005, 10:57 AM

What's with those people Peah? It's easy!!! :roll:

Not to mention how many ways there are to do it... use a lighter as you slowly work your way around the edges, the more labor intensive version of doing the same while going through an entire book of matches, the much easier holding it over the gas range with tongs, the ever simple chucking in the fireplace... sheesh, what's with those people! ;)

ROTF LMAO!! :lol: :lol: :lol: One of these days, I'm going to come into work and I swear someone's going to actually do that!

It's too funny, SD. :lol: Monday mornings are the worse. It's like they forget everything on Monday. :?

SDsalsaguy

03-07-2005, 05:24 PM

Well, they do have to find some way to burn the darn things... otherwise they just sit around clogging up the coffe cup holder, right? ;)

peachexploration

05-03-2005, 04:28 PM

Ugh! :x How many times can you tell some people! :buttkick: Don't download stuff that's not work related and get an attitude with me when your computer crashes. :evil: :headwall: Ay yi, yi! :roll:

I'm glad I'm at home now. I need a drink. :lol:

SalsaWinnipeg

05-05-2005, 10:16 AM

You've probably already seen these before, but just in case, here are some reading materials to make your Mondays a bit better and, perhaps, give you some ideas on how to deal with your (L)users ;)

http://www.theregister.co.uk/odds/bofh/
http://www.userfriendly.org/

peachexploration

05-06-2005, 03:27 PM

peachexploration

05-09-2005, 07:11 AM

I hate ADWARE!!!!! :evil: :buttkick: :headwall:

I have this executible, Seeve, on my PC and I can't get it off!!! Any ideas anyone? I deleted all instances from my registry but like the energizer bunny, it just keeps going. :x Oh, and even after the registry deletion, I can't the the executable off. Then I have these crack-head popups associated with it that keeps telling me it's not Adware! :? :roll: :evil: Yeah, Right! :roll: it's Adware AND :arrow: :spam:

Any ideas anyone? :idea:

nicelau

05-09-2005, 10:10 AM

try using adaware or spybot:
http://www.lavasoftusa.com/software/adaware/
http://www.download.com/Spybot-Search-Destroy/3000-8022_4-10289035.html?tag=pao
hope that helps get rid of the evil spywaref :evil:

peachexploration

05-09-2005, 10:25 AM

Unfortunately, spybot and antispy keep coming up empty. :evil: Going to try adaware and see if that helps. Thanks Nicelau.

peachexploration

05-18-2005, 03:59 PM

So, I'm in this store and someone asks, "Where do you work?" I tell them.
They ask again, "Are you an attorney there?" I answer no.
Then they ask, "What do you do there?" I answer, "Computer Geek" cheekishly at first and then elaborate more with specifics. Manager, supervisor, fix computers, networking, etc.
They were like "Really! :shock: Wow, I thought you were a professional. You don't really look like a computer person!"

:evil: :? :shock: :buttkick:

:roll: I guess it depends how you "define" professional. :roll:
Thank goodness I have a since of humor. :lol: :lol: :lol:

peachexploration

10-27-2005, 06:18 PM

:banana: :rocker: Can you tell I don't have this job anymore! No entries since May 2005. :rocker: :banana:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

SDsalsaguy

10-27-2005, 07:38 PM

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I'm happy for you peach!!!!

Isn;t it always nice when the problems now belong to someone else? ;)

peachexploration

10-27-2005, 07:40 PM

Yes, feel sort of sorry for the person who took my place BUT oh well.... :lol:

10-28-2005, 02:44 AM

:banana: :rocker: Can you tell I don't have this job anymore! No entries since May 2005. :rocker: :banana:

:lol: :lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol:

SDsalsaguy

10-28-2005, 09:42 AM

Yes, feel sort of sorry for the person who took my place BUT oh well.... :lol:
Let someone else be concerned about cleaning the coffee cup holders peach! ;)

lunohodov

11-06-2005, 04:56 PM

My 2 cents:

My job while in college was as sales and tech support for a local ISP back before everyone was bought up by Earthlink. The "office" I worked in was actually three rooms in the back of a hair salon outside of Athens GA! Most of the hair clients were older women, and "Blue-hair dye day" Wednesdays always flavored the air something awful! But that's another story.

I had a couple of great calls, including:

Customer: "I called you guys like three weeks ago to buy the Internet, but I haven't gotten it in the mail yet"
Me: "Did you get the CD we mailed you?"
Customer: "Sure did. I got it right here"
Me: "Have you tried putting the CD into your computer like it shows in the picture on the CD?"
Customer: "I don't have a computer"
Me: "You don't have a computer?"
Customer: "You mean I need to have a computer?"

Another good call:
A customer calls me up and purchases an unlimited dialup account. I walk him through setting up his computer for an hour and then we hang up and he gets online. Two hours later he calls me back:

Me: "*ISP NAME* Technical Support, can I help you?"
Customer: "I need some help"
Me: "How can I help you, sir?"
Customer: "I can't find naked women on the Internet."
Me: after a short pause, "Have you tried typing what you are looking for into the search box on your home page?"
Customer: "Yes, but they all want credit cards"

You see, he really wanted FREE porn!

Me: after a longer pause, "Have you tried typing the word FREE into the box?"
Customer: "Let me try that."

He hung up and I laughed till I cried! Imagine calling Tech Support b/c you can't find FREE PORN!

The Daily WTF (http://www.thedailywtf.com) is a spoon full of laugh - take it regularly every morning ;)

peachexploration

11-06-2005, 05:22 PM

:lol: :lol: :lol:

praecantricis

11-09-2005, 09:22 AM

Peach, I work in PC support - what do you do now? Is there light at the end of the tunnel for me - will I ever get out of here?

peachexploration

11-09-2005, 09:38 AM

Presently, I'm out searching. Again, in the Technology field but not so much PC Support. Hopefully, more programming or something along those lines.

When I started doing that about 15 years ago, it was fun, exciting and I had the patience of Job. Now, oh my goodness! Not so much. I wasn't so much of dealing with people who did not know but more of "People who did know and chose to do really silly things". So, my patience grew really thin and I became really stressed with my coworkers and at that point I knew it was time for a break. So Prae, it really depends on how much you can take and you're feeling a little stressed about it now, it may be a good idea to keep an eye open for something else. I waited too long unfortunately for my own mental state. :lol: :lol: Thank goodness for Salsa Forums! :D